“A Fly Committed Suicide In My Hair!”

What you are about to read is a true story. A story of a fly who’s only crime was enjoying a beautiful day and paying for it with his life. Of all the ways he could have died, this probably would have been his last choice, but a mixture of hair wax, hair gel and super hold hairspray had other plans for him . . . a deadly plan, unconventional, disgusting and absolutely hysterical! 

It’s time to hop on board the way back “Time Machine” and travel to a time (mid 1980’s to mid 1990’s) when life wasn’t as complicated and blurry eye’d technology addicts hadn’t yet zombified our world. Another words . . . before everyone on Earth had cell phones with cameras. It was a time of alternative bands like; “Flock of Seagulls, The Smiths, R.E.M.” and other awesome pop and rock stars like; “Billy Idol, Tina Turner, Pat Benatar, Meatloaf and Journey,” just to name a few.

It was also a time for both genders to equally share some seriously unusual hairstyles. And while some men and women with long hair blow dried and curved out the sides of their hair to look like the wings of a jumbo jet, I chose to go the extreme opposite and my coiffure of choice was short hair plastered with both hair gel and hair putty and then meticulously built up into razor sharp spikes, topped off with super hold hairspray!  My hair was a lethal weapon!

One beautiful sunny, summer, day, my wife and I were in the back yard just hanging out getting our “tan on” when a bug of unknown origin flew . . . no, whizzed across the top of my head. Instinctively, I raised and flailed my hands above my head in an attempt to smack it away.  My wife stared at me curiously and her lips extended into a big smile as she brought her hands to her mouth. She began laughing so  hard that tears were pouring down her cheeks.

“Oh my God, you have got to see this, oh my God” my wife screeched out in a jubilant tone. She grabbed me by the hand and guided me into the house and directly into the bathroom. “Look in the mirror, look in the mirror, what do you see?”  she again yelled out still laughing. Peering into the bathroom mirror, I noticed something odd in my hair at the top of one of my lethal spikes. Taking a closer look, I realized that; “it was a fly, a big ole fly” . . . and he had impaled himself right through the bottom of his stomach exiting through the top of his body. My hair impaled and killed a fly!

Immediately I started laughing like a maniac and took great pride in gently tilting my head back and forth and watching the fly, just hanging there, swaying back and forth like an insect bobble head. I was definitely having way to much fun with this, but the time had come to lift him off my dangerous, deadly, stalactite (or stalagmite) spikes and give him a proper burial . . . fluuuuuuuuuush!!! I washed my hair because I had fly guts on it and for the rest of the day just wore it down and natural. I mean, after all, I didn’t want to become known as “The Serial Fly Killer!”

So the next time you see a fly, I hope you remember this story and it brings a smile to your face or a chuckle to your belly, or perhaps maybe both.  Hope you all have a great day filled with many blessings! Peace Out!

If you’ve enjoyed this post, I humbly invite you to check out the rest of “Blogging Around With The Original Domestic God” for other awesome fun filled posts and pages. https://jamesrsirois.com/

 

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